The good news is that the way we look at motherhood is changing fast. We have now a growing tribe of women from different walks of life making the choice of becoming a mother not just when but how?
We now need to redefine the definition of the person who wants to become a mother. it’s not just the married woman, there are single women,there is a growing LGBTQ community, divorcees, single parents
There are many challenges and the road to motherhood is clearly bumpy when it comes to acceptance of these choices by the society in which we live. There are more myths associated with these that need to be taken care of more then anything else.
Surrogacy and adoption are the choices many couples are making today. The myths associated with these sometimes make the decision a very difficult one.
I chose surrogacy / adoption over being pregnant myself , so does it become an easier way out ? Saves my figure ? Do you bond with your child ? The child may not be healthy …. Not your bloodline ? So many myths … But once you walk through this path you realise these are to great extent myths. These are choices which may soon be the new ‘ normal ‘ .
The understanding of real issues are how we can support individuals who make these different choices at micro and macro level . Do we view them differently and label them or we give them their due as being people who have taken a path which maybe equally challenging.
At the micro-level can the immediate family unconditionally support them in this process? Can they understand and educate themselves regarding the process of surrogacy and adoption and know the real issues? At the macro level schools and communities need to understand that these are not desperate measures or shortcuts to having a progeny. The ready-made baby is easier said than done ,the process is equally demanding. The correct understanding of community about core issues related to these will end the myths associated with it from bloodline issues ,to health of the child ,to the future of the child ,bonding issues, money matters, a charitable act. When one chooses this path it is in the end to lead a more fulfilling life which could be as a couple, family, and in society.
Last but not least the mother who chose this unconventional path is no less of a woman than others she may not have given birth or breastfed the child but the unconditional love and attention she gives make her proudly say ” I am a mother “.
Reflections 